Ok I know it's early again and blah, blah, blah, but whatever. OMG!! I had one of the best dreams last night that I have had for months and months and months!! A bit weird in a way... but totally awesome!! Ok... So I have to write this quickly because I have to leave in 30 minutes for my audition, so... I'm not going to get into every single detail about it, just the really remembered and best parts. Ok, so here I go.
The Dream:
I woke up on a Sunday morning and went to church with my Dad to St. Patrick's. That's the church up here by my house btw. So we went to church and sat in the back like usual and as I'm looking at the alter I see him (guy I want to see... just making sure you know) as an alter server he walked into the church getting ready for mass. I kept looking when suddenly he looks out at the congregation and see's me. We make eye contact and I smile, he smiles back, and for the rest of mass he purposely avoids even looking in the same direction as where I am. After mass I was on my way out to the car when he comes out of the side door of the church. He looks at me with found eyes and says, "Hi Sarah." I smile happy to have the chance to talk to him again and reply, "Hi ____. It been a long time. How have you been?" Then Dad looks at me and says that he'll wait for me in the car. I then replied with a nod and he leaves. After Dad left we started talking, then he had to leave because he had a youth group meeting. So after he told me that he had to leave he said, "It was really good to see you again. I've missed you." I was a bit surprised, but got over it quickly and responded, "Same here. I missed you too." "Will you come next week?" "I would like to, but I'm not sure. If you would like to talk though you can always e-mail me." "Really?" "Of course." I said smiling. He smiled back and said, "Ok. I'll do that then. Bye." Then he left. So Monday night I got an e-mail from him and we started talking during the whole week. Just about random stuff. Then it was Sunday again and I was with my Dad in the back of church. He was serving again, but this time he didn't avert his gaze towards me. We were practically staring at each other the whole mass. Then mass was over and my Dad and I were on our way out when we ran into his Mom and Dad. So we started talking to them until he was done with what alter servers do. Then he came up to me and asked me if we could have a word alone and I obviously said of course. So we left the adults to mingle as he led me in between the church community building and the rectory (which was btw about 20 feet away from the church.) So when we got there I leaned against the wall and asked, "So whats up?" He didn't say anything when suddenly he punched the wall beside me and stared into my eyes with his own clear blue eyes. They seemed to lead straight into his soul. They were so determined, yet frightened. I was confused so I tried to get his attention. "____?" I asked curiously. Then he began. "I'm sorry. I know that you probably don't want to hear this from a guy like me, I'm sure of it. You can be mad at me about it, but I just want you to know. This past year without you has been hell. It hurt so much not being able to see you. I'm probably to late, but I like you. I like you so much." Then he looked away and started crying. I looked away as well. I had no idea that was coming! I also didn't know what to say. Then I looked at his desperate face and then at his fist that was still beside me. It had turned white. He was really pushing hard on it. Tears started to form in my eyes as I grabbed his hand and held it against my face. Then with the hand that was free I wiped the tears off his face and held his chin up so he could see my face. I then responded with the tears now starting to roll down my own face, "I could never be mad at you. The only thing I'm mad at is that I didn't know sooner. It's been hard without you and I like you too. So, so much. You could never be to late for me. I would wait forever for you." He stood there silently looking down on my crying face. Then it was his turn and he wiped the tears away from my face and showed me his wet finger. I then just realized that I was crying and now flustered was trying to wipe my face while saying, "I'm sorry." He then grabbed me and hugged me then whispered in my hair, "Don't be... Thank you." Then I smiled shyly and let the last few tear drops I had left fall as I enjoyed his warmth around me. Then suddenly he released a bit and myself still leaning on him with my hands on his chest looked up to see his face and I saw him looking down at me smiling. Then his hands moved towards my waist as his face got closer to mine. Then his arms were completely around my waist and his face was inches from mine, I had no freaking clue what I was suppose to do. Then I suddenly stopped freaking out and went with my instincts and my arms slowly came up and went around his neck. Then we kissed. It wasn't just like a short little cute peck, it was long and hard and seriously... I saw fire works. (of course I've never been kissed before so how the heck did I know that?!....lol... but seriously...idk...I could feel the difference in my dream though for some reason) Then we stopped and pulled away slowly. We smiled at each other because we finally did it after dreaming of it for so long. Then I saw someone out of the corner of my eye staring at us. I turned to see who it was, then I thought "Oh crap... I'm dead." It was my Dad... and he was giving us both this incredibly evil glare. ____ turned to see what I was looking at then went a bit pale. It almost looked like Dad was going to kill him with the look he was giving. So hurriedly I collected myself then tiptoed up and kissed him again while looking straight at Dad. (I was in a REAL daring mood...) Then I said to him, "Sorry ____, I've gtg. E-mail me later ok?" "Ok... bye." He responded. Then I ran up to Dad and dragged him to the car. When we got to the car Dad let me have... obviously... and we argued all the way home. Then when we got home he sent me up to my room and him and Mom argued for hours about it. Then Mom actually convinced Dad to let me do what I want! I was really shocked. So that night I told ____ that we could be together. We were ecstatic. That next weekend we went on our first date. It was that Saturday afternoon when he pulled up in his car to pick me up at my house. I hopped in and we were hastily gone. As we were on the road I asked, "So.. where are we going?" He smiled while still looking at the road and replied, "I want to keep it a surprise. You'll know when we get there." "Ok." I responded then it was quiet. After a few minutes of absolutely nothing, he leaned back in his seat a bit to get more comfortable and took one of his hands off the steering wheel and put it down on the counsel. I then couldn't keep my eyes off his hand. I suddenly had the extreme urge to hold it... but I wasn't sure if I should. After a minute in thought I decided to do it. So I grabbed his hand, my fingers weaved in between his, and gave it a tight squeeze. Surprised he looked down at his hand then at me. I loosened my grip while looking towards the floor and quietly said, "Sorry..." Then he squeezed my hand and said, "No. It's fine." Then we drove to our destination without another word. Hand in hand. It was an amazing day and a lot of fun and at the end of it we sat in the park looking at the creek and talked about our secrets and made promises. Then sadly the night ended and I was home again. We would go on a date at least once a week and things were going really well. We grew closer and closer with ever e-mail, phone call, hug, kiss, and word. I was the happiest I had ever been. Then a couple months later My parents were going on a second honey moon for a week, my brother was gone with friends, and my grandparents were also going to be gone. So I was going to be left alone at home. I was 16 and thought I was capable of being alone, but my parents weren't keen on the idea. So I was suppose to go with my grandparents to there week full of old people meetings... Which I wasn't happy about. I was talking to ____ about it the night it was decided and was telling him that I didn't want to go. He told me to hold on after I had finished my rant. He was gone for about 5 minutes then he came back on the phone sounding really excited and told me that his parents said that if I wanted to I could stay at there place until a family member came home. I was really happy that they had offered and I wanted to, but I had to convince my parents. So I went down stairs and told my parents about there invitation and reassured them that we wouldn't do anything cause we weren't that type of couple, that his girl cousin was there so we probably wouldn't be left alone (which I doubted, but I wanted to be convincing) and pleaded them to let me go there instead of with Grandma and Grandpa. They thought about it and called his parents up and talked about it for awhile and finally agreed to let me stay. So when everyone left I went to his house and was going to stay for a few days. It was the first day and I had already put my things in one of the spare bedroom (there house was pretty big) and was hanging out with him, his Mom, and his Aunt. We wanted to have sometime alone, but his Mom and Aunt were keeping a hawks eye on us... even though we weren't planning on doing what they feared worst we would do... After awhile ____ asked if we could play video games in his room. His Mom was ok with it, but we had to keep the door open, which we agreed to. We got to his room and he started his xbox 360 and I was about to sit down on the couch when we walked off and shut his door. I walked over to him and asked why he had shut the door and that we weren't suppose to when he looked at me playfully and said, "Well I didn't want them seeing this." and he kissed me. We were kissing each other still when suddenly we heard foot steps down the hall. We quickly stopped and I ran to the couch and grabbed a controller and started the game while he quickly opened the door and sat next to me. Then his Mom came in with a bag of chips and a couple of water bottles and asked concerned, "Why was the door shut until just now?" "Sorry Mom, it blew shut from the window again." He responded without looking away from the game. "Oh ok then. I brought you guys something to eat and drink." Then she put down her cargo on the table next to us. "Thanks" we both responded in unison. She smiled and walked to the door. She stopped in the door way and asked, "Are you ok? Do you need anything else." "Yep were fine. Don't worry" I responded still into the game. "But ____ is about to die!!" She smiled again and walked out of the room. After we were sure she couldn't hear us anymore we stopped the game, looked at each other, then started laughing. "Do you even know how to play this game? You looked pretty into shooting a gun with no ammo." He said while still laughing. "No... but I thought I looked pretty convincing for just pressing buttons." I responded after we had calmed down a bit. Then he said, "Yeah... and you said I was going to die." Then we started giggling again. We eventually stopped and looked at each other. We just stared at each other for awhile without a word. Suddenly the wind picked up outside and it blew through his room and shut the door. It broke us from our trance... sadly. I sighed then got up and made my way to the door to open it again when I heard him say, "Wait a sec." I stopped where I stood and waited. He then set the game to cpu vs. cpu and let it go by itself. Then he walked towards me and stepped in front of me and said, "That wind was oddly convenient." He smiled and began to kiss me again. We did so for awhile, then he pushed hard enough so that I lost my balance and fell on the bed that was behind me. Then he was on top of me kissing me... again. We were like in a full make-out session. Then he moved his left hand...
Suddenly Mom jumped on top of me and snuggled into my bed... Just cause... -_-' One of the best dreams in my life and it had to be ruined by my Mother... I was so sad it wasn't true.... It's kind of a perverted dream in a way though... I don't know why... Oh well... I was happy in it. Does this mean I like him though? Cause damn.... I've never had a dream about a guy like that... Or is it just cause I'm lonely and it doesn't matter who it is? I hope that's not the case.... I don't want to be a player... Which having the thought of it doesn't matter who it would be would make me... I guess.....? But when I see him again I guess I'll find out if those are the feelings I have towards him and not. Funny though... The last dream I had about a guy I like was with him.... I'm doomed.... T-T Sigh.... Oh well.... Life goes on. Well... I've gtg. ChibiSukie signing out.
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